Diet Brilliance

The Treatment that can Cure Compulsive Eating

March 10th, 2010

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“Oh, she’s a big girl, she likes her food”.

The reality is, I don’t “like” food. I hate food. It’s transformed me into someone totally defined by the layers of tissue that leak over the top of my jeans. But I also love food. I worship it. I crave it. Every waking minute is shaped by what I am eating and what I will be eating in the near future.

The thing is, you can’t simply give up food. It’s not like being an alcoholic. You’d pass away. I try to eat healthy foods but as soon as that first piece of fruit passes my lips it’s like a switch has been flicked and abruptly I’m bingeing on whatever I can lay my hands on.

I binge unthinkingly and indiscriminately, filling a void that isn’t in my stomach. I don’t know why I can’t stop.

I see people gawking at me on the streets, judging me. Fat is greedy. Fat is lazy. Fat people are second-class citizens. If they could live a day inside my skin, preoccupied with consumption, a sanctuary where I can find comfort and even fleeting seconds of joy in a life which is otherwise thoroughly depressing, they might grasp that I’m every bit as deserving of sympathy as an anorexic.

Food is my best friend and whilst my most important relationship in life is with food, I have no energy left to give to anyone, or anything else. I used to love painting once. Not now. I can’t rouse the passion I used to feel because with every passing second I’m obsessed with where my next mouthful’s going to come from.

My GP has offered me antidepressants, as if an false, chemical feeling of contentment is going to distract me from my constant cycle of binge-eating and isolation.

I want to change my mind. I know other people eat normally. They aren’t driven mad with thoughts about food every moment of every day. I want to listen to my tummy and know when it’s advising me I’m hungry. I have forgotten how that feels – intuition.

That’s why I’m going to Mark Newey at Winning Minds. His unique neural recoding treatment can liberate me of the shackles of my addiction and the person I have become. It can remind me of the person I honestly am and give me the independence I want and deserve.

Log onto www.winningminds.co.uk/eating-disorders